When Leadership Quietly Becomes Too Heavy (600 words)

When Leadership Quietly Becomes Too Heavy

There’s a pattern I keep noticing in my work with leaders—and once you see it, it’s hard to ignore.

When things feel uncertain or fast-moving, capable people tend to respond by taking on more.

In insurance agencies, this often shows up during periods of regulatory change, staffing shortages, mergers, or rapid growth. Someone steps in to “just handle it.” Then they keep handling it. Eventually, it becomes invisible labor—work that’s expected but never formally named.

From the outside, it can look like commitment. Sometimes it even looks like leadership.

But underneath it, there’s usually something else happening: people quietly absorbing work and expectations that were never meant to be theirs alone.

Over time, this creates a familiar cycle I hear about again and again from agency leaders, managers, and producers:

What makes this pattern especially tricky is that it’s rarely intentional.

No one sets out to overload their most reliable people. Instead, it’s the result of unclear roles, constant change, and a culture that rewards stepping up without always clarifying what to step back from.

In entrepreneurial environments—especially owner-led agencies—this dynamic can be amplified. When you’ve built something from the ground up, it’s easy to default to “I’ll just take care of it” or to unconsciously expect others to do the same. Over time, that mindset can spread, creating bottlenecks and burnout rather than agility.

One of the most helpful shifts I see leaders make is learning to pause and ask a deceptively simple question:

“Is this actually mine to carry?”

That question does more than reduce overload. It forces clarity.

When leaders start asking these questions out loud, something important happens. Teams gain permission to surface misalignment instead of compensating for it. Decisions get faster because authority is clearer. And people stop confusing exhaustion with effectiveness.

This isn’t about doing less or lowering standards. It’s about doing the right work at the right level.

In my work with insurance leaders navigating change—whether that’s modernizing operations, developing new leaders, or responding to market pressures—the most resilient organizations aren’t the ones where everyone is stretched thin. They’re the ones where roles, expectations, and decision rights are explicit enough that people don’t have to guess.

That clarity creates capacity. Not just operationally, but emotionally.

When people aren’t constantly carrying what doesn’t belong to them, they have more energy for strategic thinking, client relationships, and innovation. They’re better able to lead through uncertainty without defaulting to panic or over-functioning.

And perhaps most importantly, they stop internalizing the idea that struggle is a personal failure rather than a signal that something in the system needs attention.

My goal in sharing patterns like this is simple: to name what many leaders are already experiencing but don’t always have language for.

If this feels familiar, you’re not behind—and you’re not alone. You’re likely responding exactly as many capable leaders do in complex environments.

The opportunity now is to notice the pattern, name it, and choose a more sustainable way forward—one grounded in clarity, shared ownership, and leadership that doesn’t require carrying everything yourself.

That’s where purpose starts to replace panic.

This article is adapted from the book Moving from Panic to Purpose: Surviving & Thriving during Unrelenting Change at Work.

Reprinted with permission.